personal development

How to deal with Stress During the Festive Holiday Season

how to deal with stress

The holidays are a time of happiness and merriment for most people.  But did you know that they are also a major cause of stress for some people?  While many find themselves gathering with family and friends, still others are spending the holidays alone, or are facing hard financial times.

However, finding ways to cope with stress on holiday isn’t as difficult as you may think.  Many people find themselves focusing on their problems during what should be a happy time.  These problems can include anything from not being in a relationship to the holiday blues.

The holiday blues, as many people know it, come from setting unrealistic expectations about how the holidays will turn out.  In your mind, you may build it up to be wonderful and filled with laughter, but unfortunately an argument breaks out.  This can lead to feelings of disappointment.  However, finding ways to reduce stress on holiday are only as far down as a few paragraphs.  Keep reading to find ways to manage holiday stress.

  1. Set a budget. A lot of people find themselves going into debt during the holidays.  This is a major cause of stress. Spending too much causes unnecessary financial pressure that can follow you through the holidays and into the New Year.

To avoid this problem, set aside the maximum amount of money you want to spend on presents this year.  Stick to this figure, and have the funds available.  Try not to rely too much on credit cards, as this incurs extra debt.  Setting a budget will help you feel more relaxed about your holiday spending.  And it will get you prepared for a prosperous and financially sound New Year!

 

  1. Mingle with relatives. A lot of people find themselves spending the holidays with in-laws.  If you don’t get along with your in-laws, it can be difficult to feel like you fit in.  Rather than keeping a silent vigil, find things to talk about.  Bring up subjects that interest others. But don’t brag too much about yourself.  As the holidays go by, you will find that people approach you more often.  And you will enjoy yourself a lot more!

 

  1. Bring a dish. Pitching in with preparing food can significantly reduce your stress on holiday.  Not to mention it helps take stress off of other people.  Try preparing a dish at home, and bring it with you.

Make the dish at your in-laws’ place.  Offer them a sample.  This gets other people involved, and will make them more eager to talk with you.

 

  1. Don’t expect perfection. A lot of people pressure themselves to create a perfect holiday for other people.  This, according to experts, creates unnecessary stress, and can make you feel bad if things don’t turn out exactly as planned.  Tell yourself that you don’t need to be perfect.  Everyone makes mistakes, and things will not always go exactly as planned.  Realize that you can’t do everything.  Also, don’t be afraid to ask for help.  People like to get involved.  Realize that you can only do so much.  That way, you don’t expect too much of yourself, and you will be able to enjoy yourself that much more!

 

  1. Simplify your decorating.  It’s easy to put up a lot of decorations for the holidays.  When you have to take them down, you can feel overwhelmed and perhaps let down.  This can lead to feelings of apathy about any upcoming holidays.  Instead of going overboard with trimmings, keep decorations to a minimum.  Put up only what you can manage.  This will make it easier for you to enjoy the holidays and be merry!

Stress during the holidays can put a damper on your holiday, but getting involved and taking a positive approach to the holidays can do wonders for lowering your stress levels.  Taking these stress management techniques to your next holiday gathering can greatly reduce the stress on holiday you would normally feel.  And you will be a lot happier.

A Lesson in Self-Confidence from Winston Churchill

self-confidence

My wife and I went to the cinema recently to see the film “Darkest Hour”. The film tells the story of Winston Churchill during the early days of his time as Prime Minister of Britain during the Second World War.

It’s a fantastic film and I really recommend you go to see it if you haven’t already done so.

One of the things that stood out for me was the incredible courage and self-confidence shown by Churchill at this point during the war, when Britain’s fate in the war looked very uncertain. The German armies were marching across Western Europe defeating all before them and an invasion of Britain seemed inevitable after the imminent loss of the vast majority of the British army in Northern France.

Churchill had formed his war Cabinet of senior politicians and advisors to help direct the British war effort but from the very start it seemed that rather than supporting him, they opposed Churchill’s plans to evacuate the British army from France and begin the fightback against Germany.
Even the two most senior members of his own party, Chamberlain and Halifax, opposed his plans to fight and tried to persuade him to negotiate a peace treaty. Churchill was adamant that a peace treaty would be futile and the only course of action was to fight.

Where on earth did he find the self-confidence to stand up against such overwhelming pressure and lead Britain to eventual victory in the war?

No doubt there are many factors that contribute to self-confidence but one of the most important ones is having the help and support of people around you. In Churchill’s case the rock that he was able to lean on when he needed that support was his wife Clementine. It was Clementine who encouraged him to take on the role of Prime Minister and she was there to support and encourage him when the pressure to back down and negotiate a peace treaty would have been almost irresistible.

In Churchill’s own words “My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.” He knew how important it was to surround himself with supportive people!
None of us are ever likely to face a situation as perilous as Churchill but we all face challenges in our daily lives.

How do you feel when problems crop up? Do you feel confident in your own ability to deal with them or do you always have that nagging voice in your head which says “I can’t do this”.
Don’t worry if you do – we all experience this feeling known as self-doubt from time to time. So what can we do to relieve these feelings of self-doubt and build confidence in ourselves?
One of the first things you need to do is follow the example of Churchill in his Darkest Hour. You see one of the major causes of self-doubt is people who either fail to support you or who actually fuel your negative feelings.

Don’t listen to people who bring you down. They are like a poison for your mind and a drain on your energy.

Be careful of your friends. If you have friends who are frequently negative about things then start to politely distance yourself from them. Don’t allow their negativity to rub off on you.
Churchill’s closest allies in his war cabinet should have been his political colleagues, Chamberlain and Halifax, but they were constantly negative about his plans and tried to talk him out of what he believed in.

Churchill’s response was to distance himself from them and instead listen to supportive people such as the King and his wife. People who believed in him and encouraged him.
Be aware of friends who think they are doing you a favour by talking you out of doing things. This will subconsciously reinforce any thoughts you have that say you can’t do things.

Surround yourself with people who support and encourage you or reassure you when times get tough. Friends and family can be good sources of support but I know of people who find a supportive stranger such as a therapist or coach to be effective too.

Identify those people who support you, and nurture your relationships with them. They will be important for giving you strength and confidence when feeling down.
There are many ways to help improve your self-confidence but the first thing you should do is follow the example of Churchill by surrounding yourself with positive and supportive people and distancing yourself from those who are negative.

This will help you develop the confidence you need when faced with your own darkest hours.

 

 

Video Sales Letters

I have been spending the last few weeks creating a video sales letter for a new report that I’ve written called “The Pathway”. This is something I became quite interested in after attending a webinar just before Christmas.

Take a look here and let me know what you think. I love getting feedback so please drop be an email.

Improve your communications skills and feel less stressed

Stress is a part of everyday life. It can creep up at the most convenient or inconvenient times. Whether small or large, the causes of stress are wide and varied, bringing with them intense emotion and excitement. But even amid pressures and not so expected events, you can manage to find peace in the face of conflict.

The question is: What is the best way to deal with stress, when it feels as though every emotion within you is racing?

Listen

If you’re stressed over everything under the sun, your emotions are running on hyper speed. Your thoughts are moving faster than a freight train, and you can’t seem to sort out thoughts.

When this happens, you have already been propelled into the fight or flight mode. Your brain is trying to put the puzzle pieces together. And most likely, you don’t have time to hone in on how you feel about the situation.

Slow down. Grab the reins, and get in touch with what you are feeling. Sometimes people find it hard to communicate their own thoughts when they’re stressed. But stress management requires that you get in touch with yourself. When you take time to really get to know yourself and your feelings about the situation, you are that much closer to figuring out how to solve the problem.

Communication

Sometimes just talking things out with a friend or close loved one can ease the stress of the situation. A spouse can sometimes see things in you that you can’t always see in yourself.

When you open up to a significant other, you make yourself vulnerable to your true fears and feelings about the stress at hand. And you are finally able to release some stress.

Tell your partner what they can do to help ease your stress. And if possible, ask for a back rub. Not only does this feel good, but also it helps you get rid of some of the physical symptoms of stress.

Your muscles tense up when you’re stressed, and your breathing quickens. A soft massage helps loosen muscle tightness and encourages deep breathing, which in turn, will help you get rid of stress’ physical manifestations.

If you talk to a family member or close friend, ask if they have any suggestions. Other people may sometimes be able to give you advice on how to alleviate your stress. As a means of stress management, talking about the source of your stress helps get out emotions that are bottled up inside of you. It also gives others the opportunity to help you out.

Communicating, as a stress management technique, can be done in a number of ways. For example, you may find that recording your thoughts in a journal or diary is a great way to get stressful feelings outside of your body and onto an external source.

When you write in a diary, you can also keep a record of your life and what may be bothering you. And you can always go back and read later to see how you’ve improved.

When you’re under any kind of stress, good or bad, you tense up emotionally as well. When you keep these feelings inside, you can feel as though you’re about to burst.

To avoid this problem, or to at least cut down on your pressure, don’t let the burden rest on you alone. If the problem rests on you to solve it, try to develop a game plan, and ask someone if they will be there to talk to you and help you through each step of your stress.

People are generally very receptive when they know you’re under stress. Also, it may help to ask your partner to share the responsibilities of taking care of your home and family. If you’re too stressed out at the end of the day, ask your partner if they can put the kids to bed or make dinner, if that is usually your responsibility.

Take a stress management seminar. A lot of states, provinces and community centers offer stress management seminars. These seminars simulate stressful situations, and often give you the opportunity to vent your feelings about a stressful situation. They may even act out stressful scenarios to see how you respond.

Attending these seminars gives you the opportunity to communicate your own feelings and get feedback from others. Stress management seminars usually average about two hours in length, and are a great way to channel negative energy into a constructive solution.

When you find yourself getting stressed, it’s important to remember that communicating your feelings or venting frustrations are great ways to take the pressure off your heavy heart and onto someone who can help you.

Friends and family are some of your greatest sources of stress relief. They are there to offer help and guidance. Take this help, and run toward a more sane life!

4 Great Ways to start your Journey to Success in Life

successOne of the most important stages in achieving success is to take action! My website is in its infancy at the minute and I am still learning the ropes from my mentor so I can only apologise if this article is a bit amateurish. Writing this article is my way of taking action.

These are some of my favourite tips for achieving success:

1) Write Down Your Goals.

This is the very first thing anyone who has ever been successful has done. I know some people think this is an unnecessary waste of time but I can assure you that if you skip this step then its very unlikely that you will ever improve your current situation.

Take time and decide what you want to achieve. Be specific – e.g. don’t say “I want to be rich”. Instead say “I want to have one million pounds/dollars/euros in my account”. Also give a target date to achieve your goal. By creating goals you are telling yourself what you are going to achieve and when you are going to achieve it.

2) Make Plans.

When you have decided on your goals you can then move on to making a plan to achieve them. Take action on your plans and try to ensure that you do something every day which takes you closer to realising your goals. Accept that you will face challenges but be determined to overcome them.

3) Celebrate Success

Every time you achieve a goal you should celebrate your achievement. This is why you should have a range of goals – both small and big ones. In the early stages when you hit one of your goals, even if it is a small one, you will start to realise that success is possible.

4) Learn From An Expert

To improve your current situation you are almost certainly going to have to learn new skills. This is nothing to be ashamed off or worried about. You can either try to learn new skills yourself or you can find an expert to teach you. From personal experience I have found that learning from the skills and experiences of others is by far the most successful.

Be careful though and ensure that those you learn from are actually knowledgeable. For example there are thousands of supposed money-making experts online. Most of them have never made any significant money. You wouldn’t take a golf lesson from an amateur or diet advice from an obese person so don’t take financial advice from someone who is broke.